Catch 22

SO as most of you know I have been on a weight loss journey for a while now and I must say that it is not going so great, hence my title. A couple of months back I was struggling with my mood and having so crazy moments with this life of bipolar. Because I was in this really bad slump I went in to have my meds checked and my doctor put me on a new drug. Now the problem with this drug is it has the the highest percentage of weight gain than all of the other drugs I have been on, including the one that cause me to gain all the weight the first time, which was 60lbs.

Because I was in such a funk I was willing to try anything, but I knew that there was a major chance of me gaining weight, but it was unclear as to how much. Now keep in mind, I wanted to feel better, but I didn't want to hinder my efforts of going to the gym. Well guess what, I gain over 13lb in 3 weeks. Now you might be thinking that it is my eating or lack of going to the gym, nope that's not it because I work out 3 days a week with a group trainer and 2 days with a personal trainer. I also watch what I eat and even have scaled back on snacking, but the drugs causes weight gain regardless. My doctor keeps telling me that it will taper off in about 3 months, but he is out on a 4 week vacation, leaving me to try this med for another month.

Needless to say, I have highly ticked off because he did not tell me he would be gone for a month and I do not want to take these pills anymore, because I am spending a total of $650 plus a month for workouts that are useless. I have to keep going because I am under contract, but I feel like I am just spending my wheels like a hamster, going round and round and getting no where. SO I am HOT, HOT, HOT! What makes me mad was I told my doc that I did not want to stay on these pills if I went over 10lbs and he agreed, but he never told me that he would be out of town for such a long period of time and I can't do nothing about it until he comes back. So I am stuck. There is no guarantee that he will even change them because he can be a total jerk when he want to push something that he think will be better, even if we have tried better methods. So now I am just sitting here, counting down the days until he returns and get me off this crazy crap.

Don't get me wrong, I am thankful that the meds did what the needed to do, but I am not willing to do what I did the last time and put on weight because I was afraid to speak up and everybody thought it was better for me. I WILL NOT DO IT! Besides I can't afford to gain 20, 30 or even the 13lbs I have gain, because it is just not healthy. So we are going to have to try other methods. So wish me well and hopefully, I will find something else that will do the trick and I will not have to stay on something that is causing my health to be in the ditch.